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A man known as Heydar Tegyr has stolen fish steaks from my brother by killing his pack llama in the middle of Britain as he wasn't paying attention. Let it be known that those bearing the surname Tegyr are thieves and should be treated as such.

- Gilius

A sketch is pinned below:

Dear sir,

I resent being called a thief. I have these fish steaks that were located on this beast, I have not touched a single one and would be glad to return them. It was not my intention to squirrel these fish steaks away and had intended on making it known by posting notice on the board that these were in my possession, alas time got the better of me and I dozed off in my bed before I was able to dictate a note to my cousin. If you'd like these back, feel free to contact me and we can arrange a meeting in a well guarded town.

These knee jerk reactionary comments are what breaks down the civil society we live in. If you want to consider me a thief, fine I can always use a little more food in my belly but, my intentions, though I did have to slay the animal was to ensure someone else less than honest not pilfer the goods.

Finally, to slander my family name, the name which is held by my brother, Cyrus as well, without trying to retrieve all the facts as I do believe you have our bird coordinates is egregious to say the least! Next time, perhaps your brother ought to feed his animals and not neglect animal life entrusted to his care, but I suppose letting an animal starve is a perfectly legitimate reason to point fingers for his own wrong doing.

If your brother wishes to clear this matter up with me, we can discuss the return of these items, without ransom of course.

Heydar Tegyr,
625-658-845

If you want to believe it is I who is disturbing civil society by pointing out wrongdoing then so-be-it. If I made this post in haste and you really meant to return them - then I apologize however my animal may have gotten hungry and wandered away to find some grass but that's no excuse to kill the poor beast to see what he was carrying. That pack llama wasn't cheap for a poor cook like myself. Not the first time I've had my fish taken so I'm a bit angry about it. I suppose a seasoned thief would have known to disguise his identity before doing the deed - so there's that.

If the fish are returned I'll retract my accusations and apologize for the misunderstanding.

-Sherman the not-so-landlocked-Cook

Heydar had returned the fish to me personally along with a new pack animal - I appreciate the gesture and apologize for pointing fingers so swiftly. Let the record show Tegyrs are men of their word.

- Sherman the Cook